Monday, August 17, 2009

Officious Intermeddlers and The Things They Say

As we've increased confidence in our choice to homeschool, we've graduated from announcements amongst close friends and family to mentions in casual conversation at various social functions.

I am literally astounded at the broad brush statements, generalizations, half truths, and blatant insults vague acquaintances feel confident in uttering as an acceptable means of conversation with my mention of homeschooling.

The most common dim witted utterance I've heard is .....

"I knew a (insert relation here) that was homeschooled, and that kid was weird."


Weird. What a profound, thought provoking articulation there, Professor KnowsSoMuch. Your vast experience with homeschooling reaches far and wide and you seem to have an infinate basis of knowledge supporting your stance. How thoughtful and perceptive you are!

Other stimulating variations include .....

"Make sure you 'socialize'. Socialization is KEY!"
Or
"But just think of all the wonderful elementary, school, junior high & high school experiences he will be missing out on!"


It is painfully obvious to me how well your public school education has served you in the area of social settings. It seems you've developed a permanent (and likely fatal) case of "foot in mouth" disease.

In looking back at my middle and high school years I cannot recall very many memories I treasure. It was a painful, awkward, unsure, unsettling, unambiguous period, and am glad to have it behind me. It was because I was able to look past the immediate and see the big picture in life I believe, is what made me the person I am today.

If I can spare my son the time wasted, I will go to any length to do so. Make no mistake, I don't intend on sheltering him or secluding him, I just do not see socialization in a public school setting as the pinnacle of success for a happy, healthy child. I want my children to live, grow and decide for themselves who they are and what their beliefs are in a loving, non-judgmental, non-confrontational environment.

I have wondered aloud to my husband, if, by sharing our choice to homeschool we are opening ourselves up for these types of comments. Ralph, ever pragmatic says yes, we are but I say, no. I don't recall asking for opinions, counsel, admonishments or other ill gotten advisements.

I made a statement, a declaration, a vocalization.

It would be as though someone said to me, "I am going to buy a new car" this is a statement. Entirely different from, "I am going to buy a new car, what do you think?" or "Have you ever purchased a new car?"

We are not having a debate. We are not negotiating. I did not make an affirmation for you to offer a counterpoint in suggestion.

It is exactly this sort of attitude, ignorance and blatant disreguard for boundaries and social etiquette that makes me say "It may take a village to raise a child, but I've seen the village, and I don't want it anywhere near my children."

(Katie Lewis, if you read this... you are an educator that will always be the exception to that statement!)





1 comment:

babyofmine714 said...

Ohhhhh, Honey. Perfectly said! I decided at the tender age 13 that I wanted to homeschool in no small part BECAUSE of the experiences and events public high school handed to me (although I prefer to call them traumatizing challenges I overcame). I applaud your will and courage to CONTINUE the home education process that began with your kids at birth, but I offer you my personal ovation for stepping outside the box, acknowledging what is best for your kids and taking it head on. We all know it isn't an easy ride...but, like all things family, it's the best ride around. Bravo Z family!!